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July 21, 2009
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Spelunking 18 by persephone-the-fish Spelunking 18 by persephone-the-fish
Why indeed. I am enjoying the statue painting, by the way. And also the usage of YEE OLDEE ENGLISHE up there. Sorry about that. Also, I hope :iconbosshamster: likes what I've done to his character in terms of design, as my current drawing style is a bit different than his. I have a feeling I'm going to hate painting his clothes almost as much as I hate painting Chaos. Like I've said, it's not the drawing that gets annoying, its gimping up these things using a fucking mouse. PAIN IN THE ASS.

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:icondragonscholar:
I think you actually have a very good storytelling pace here. Though I have an idea of what's happening, I'm quite enjoying seeing what's next - and you've done really good with the characters!

Well done indeed.
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:iconpersephone-the-fish:
Thanks! Pacing is one of things I'm worried about most here: I wasn't sure if I was moving fast enough. Keeping what's happening next secret didn't seem like too important a priority when we all know before the story even starts that they all end up together since meeting was the premise I started from. My thumbnails included five more pages that I was able to cut by changing the dialogue and dropping some info and dialogue, but I still worried a bit about how much time I was spending just with Midnight and Chaos. The introduction of the deaf brother was actually something I jammed in to get them off the floor and moving again. And the paneling, I'm a bit worried about the paneling. And the dialogue. I'm worried about sticking in too many infodumps. To say nothing of the drawings themselves, the fact that my backgrounds lack detail and proper perspective that I am not at this time skilled enough to render, and the painting of the characters, which I feel might be a bit too garish and bright at times.

Any way. This is totally a great learning experience!
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:icondragonscholar:
You're doing very well. It seems that you've got a real talent for this.

I understand your concerns, but I'd keep in mind how you're learning very quickly - and I do see definite improvements in your work. Your pacing tightened quickly, you experimented with panels and distances more and more, and it seemed your style matured very quickly.

I always say that fandom/geeky stuff is great for gaining skill - you're pretty much an example of how fast one adapts.

Whenever this ends (unless it becomes a permanent thing), I think a webcomic may really be in your future.

The main strengths I see is:
1) Good use of character.
2) Good pacing - especially later on you tightened up and got more done in less space.
3) Your innovation with the sign language and Chaos' knowledge of runes were great.

I may have to mention your fast growth in my next speech on geeky jobs!
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:iconpersephone-the-fish:
WOW. It's good to know some people think I'm getting things sorta right :D Thanks! I'll try not to let it go to my head =p
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:iconsuperashbro:
Hmm, I can see where this story is going, and I like it :#1:.
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:iconpersephone-the-fish:
Yeah, really, it should be pretty clear at this point. Anyone got a soft? Golden needle? Anyone?
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:iconbosshamster:
Yeah, uh, sorry about making him so complex. :iconsweatdropplz:

Still, what you've done is good so far, so no complaints here!
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:iconpersephone-the-fish:
It's okay, really. I did it to myself =P
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